Gone...

2 min read

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Sacha-Nievsky's avatar
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Once again she's gone away from me... Away for someone else... I was not enough and yet she says she doesn't want to lose me...
And I wonder... How can I draw and paint and write when you've taken all the wind out from my sails? How can I fly when you keep plucking the feathers from my wings? I do not want to feel anymore. But I wish I could tell you that I am glad you have perhaps cured me of my stupid obsession with love. If I just shut down my feelings, there will be no pain. There will be no more anxiety.

But I will paint and draw and write because you cannot light out my flames. No matter how ill you treat me, I will not let you crush my creativity with your lack of love for me. I don't need your love if you don't want mine. I will love you. I will love you and wish for your happiness, but I will keep my distance because no matter how much I love you, I cannot let my family, my friends and my students down by being crippled with anxiety. Anxiety... I will commit you to paper... Exorcise you! You need me girl, I don't need you.

I am stronger than this... I love you... I love you... I love you but you are killing me and you are not free if you're with me so because I love you so much, I am setting you free. Never again worry about me. Don't worry. I will disappear completely. That's how much I love you. And how much I love you means I will still be there the day you need me. But please... Please don't toy with me... Just don't do that to me. I love you kitty cat... I love you... oh how I love you. Adieu. Adieu...
© 2016 - 2024 Sacha-Nievsky
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EndlessLovingDream's avatar
A wonderul piece showing so much deep emotions. I can say that everyone is capable to find him/herself in this at a certain moment of a mood or life expereince. It is all about this- gathering phragments of life and pictures we can remember at the end to try to fill complete.... if possible.....